Tuesday, May 12, 2009

two can play at this game, jason.

I should have realized something was up last night. Jason came home, rummaged in the cabinet, and announced, "This is the worst candy bowl in the whole world."

My trademark wit intact, I retorted, "YOU'RE the worst candy bowl in the world," and thought no more of it.

That is, until just now, when I discovered P's Easter goodies buried under a mound of craft paper. Jackpot! There were three mini caramel eggs and a couple small Dove eggs, too! I would put them with my secret chocolate stash, behind the extra packets of McDonald's sweet 'n' sour sauce in the "Dairy" bin in our fridge door.

TREASON! The dairy bin holds nothing but chicken eggs, condiments and cheese slices. My pastel foil-wrapped peanut butter cups are no more. My carefully guarded caramel eggs have been torn from their nest. I have been cuckolded.

As the only person in the house tall enough to access the dairy bin, Jason, the finger of suspicion points to you. Fine. You want to eat my hard-stolen Easter candy? Fine. No longer will the best treats be squirreled away in the kitchen. Clothing bins in the attic, meet my good friend, "Cookies." M&Ms, keep quiet in your new hidey-hole under the floorboards next to the air duct cover. If I need to keep caramel eggs from melting before we can turn on the air, the toilet tanks are nice and cool.

It's been broughten.

5 comments:

  1. I am laughing my ass off. I just realized that there was a cookie missing from my box...and it sent me over the edge. I feel your pain, and I use the back of my dish cabinet for my stash!

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  2. Toilet tanks. That's where people keep their drugs.

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  3. I hide candy now...and L is only 2!!

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  4. LOL My roomie & I (2 grown woman in our 30's & 40's) both have our candy stash even though there's no one to hide it from. I think it's an inherent trait in women.

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  5. I can't promise you much, my friend, but I can promise in 3.5 weeks, you will have access to all the cake, cookies,and cannolis that you can stomach. Oh, and chocolate truffles that you don't have to share with anyone.

    Love,
    Lizanne

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